What the cook is this?
Are We Cooked is a real-time emotional heatmap of the world. Pick your moods, we rate your cooked level on a scale of 1 to 10, and plot it on a giant glowing map. That's it. That's the whole thing.
The global vibe check nobody asked for but everyone needed.
How It Works
Pick your moods
Slide your cooked level from 0 to 10, tag what's got you feeling that way, and drop an optional comment if you've got something to say.
We rate your cooked level
Your submission gets scored on the cooked scale — from Not Even Preheated to Absolutely Charcoal — plus a one-liner roast and emoji to match.
You appear on the map
Your pin gets anonymously plotted on the global Cooked Monitor. Watch the world's mood shift in real-time. Countries light up. Cities glow. It's beautiful and slightly concerning.
The Scale
0 = vibing · 10 = absolutely charcoal
Not Even Preheated
You haven't even turned the oven on.
Barely Warm
Lukewarm at best.
Room Temp
Existing. Neutral. A beige emotion.
Lightly Toasted
A little crispy around the edges.
Starting to Sizzle
The heat is on. You can feel it.
Medium Rare
Not great, not terrible. A gas station sandwich.
Getting Crispy
Things are heating up and not in a good way.
Well Done
Overdone. Should have been pulled out earlier.
Extra Crispy
Someone should have pulled you out hours ago.
Burnt to a Crisp
There is very little left to save.
Absolutely Charcoal
You are ash. There is nothing left to burn.
Privacy
We take your emotional oversharing seriously. Here's the deal:
100% anonymous. No accounts. No emails. No sign-ups. Nothing personally identifiable is ever shown.
No tracking. We don't use cookies, analytics, or any third-party trackers. We literally do not care who you are.
Fuzzy locations. Your pin is offset by ~8 miles by default. Nobody's finding your apartment from a mood rating.
Rate-limited. One submission per day per device. We use a fingerprint hash — not to identify you, but to stop spam.